The Tooth Fairy

Tooth Emergency…..

Nathan needs his tooth pulled, I tried to do it I even wiggled it a little…..just can’t.  This goes back to my own childhood, I was terrified.  At age 7 I stopped eating for two weeks because my tooth “may” come out during the exercise of eating.  My mom thought me ridiculous, totally true; and I was mistrustful of her, “let me just wiggle it a little” tact.  I held on to the front tooth until it was drawing flies.  My mom sent me down the street to the home of our family dentist and it literally came out in his hand without any effort.  I cried, yelling, and sobbed all the way home.  I totally realized how silly I was and how overplayed the incident was, but none the less I held onto my twitchy self and was terrified of teeth.  My grandmother’s false teeth were no trouble because after all…..they weren’t really teeth.  Childhood logic!    Can’t imagine how this phobia came to fruition but I can tell you the cost to my ego.  As I grew, it followed me.  I was in Nursing School and was home for dinner one evening when my mother spit out her crown on her plate, I took one look at it and the next thing I knew I was on the carpet with most of my dinner on top of me.  Yes, I passed out cold; and no, that was not the only time. 

I was on duty in the ER triage area after 11PM when a young man in uniform…basketball I think, came running in with his parents, keep in mind 20 plus years ago, we didn’t even have security on duty in the ED and when security was needed we called and one of the Maintenance guys and they would show up with a huge wrench in their back pocket.  That was usually enough to stop the reasonable fool, if not the police were summoned.  So it was me, the parents and the patient.  I smiled at them and asked what brought them out to the ED this evening and as the boy smiled his broken tooth smile, opening his hand that had several pieces of teeth covered in blood, as did his broken smile.  Boom, I passed out cold face down on the table, my arms hanging at my sides.  I could hear the panic of the said parents as they rushed about looking for a staff member to help, but all the staff was behind a locked door.  The father picked up the phone on my desk and called the hospital operator and explained the nurse was out cold.  Next thing I knew I was being dragged, not too carefully and flopped unceremoniously on a stretcher.  My coworkers laughed at me for days, weeks, months, and years.  Finally, all the witnesses to my drop have moved on to other things and I rarely get any teasing, as I am the last left to remember.  Later In my career, I realized that the tooth thing extended to the nose as well.  As I was circulating in a plastics case one morning and the MD was hammering on a woman’s nose, and I quickly exited knowing what would come next…more pavement. 

So as you can guess, I am not any help to my children in pulling their teeth.  Healthy white non-gunky teeth are my favorite and I will brush their teeth even floss their teeth, and never pull their teeth.  That is what Grandmas are for!